95
Wesley the Weasel
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As you reach out a hand to pat the weasel on the head, he bares his sharp teeth at you and hisses menacingly. You stop and look up at Slumblebore with a frown.

"Ah, I'm afraid that Wesley has taken a dislike to you. He's normally a very friendly and affectionate weasel but he hates all Snakefang House students and he can sniff them out instantly."

Slumblebore speaks sharply to his pet: "Wesley! Come here boy! Here!"

The weasel cowers and scampers over to the big desk, where it hops up, squats in the plate of raisins and chatters to itself.

"Yes, my weasel here has a rather sad history. Wesley was once a real boy, a student just like you Arthur," Slumblebore explains, "until another pupil from Snakefang House cast a spell on him in a dispute about who had the fastest broomstick. The spell transformed him permanently into the weasel you see now - and gave Wesley an enduring hatred of all Snakefang House students.

At the mention of Snakefang, Weasley narrows his eyes at you malevolently and brazenly defecates onto the plate of raisins.

"Because he was an orphan I felt the kindest thing I could do was to adopt him as my pet. I had that fetching red waistcoat and matching hat that he wears specially made for him by my tailor in Hippotomews. That was when I named him Wesley. Wesley the Weasel has a rather good ring to it, don't you think? His original boy name was Barry. Or possibly Gary.

"Why do I tell you all this Arthur? I want you to know that for all my students I will always be there for them. I will always be there for you, when you need help the most. Always, Arthur, always. Metaphorically. Just like I was for Gary. Or was it Larry.