79
Jape's joke time
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You raise your hand and most of the other children do the same.

"Brilliant!" says Professor Jape, "How about this one."

"Knock knock!" says Jape. "Who's there?" you all reply. "Eye needap." "Eye needap who?" "Well come on in and use the toilet!"

"That's quite a good one!" you whisper to Aaron.

"Ok children, next one:

"Why did the Ravenwing student go to the Hogsnorts dining room? Come on, any guesses? No?

"To eat. To eat. D'you get it? You know: Ravenwing, like a bird. To eat: tweet. Oh you lot are hopeless. Right next one.

"What do you call a naked Spanish man on the beach?"

"Any ideas?" shouts out Professor Jape thoroughly enjoying himself now. "No? You call him Señor Willy."

A few groans and shouts of laughter in the room.

"What about a hippo with only one leg? A hoppo!"

"Right, listen to this." Jape continues. "There was a farmer taking his cow to market to sell. The trouble is that this cow is very old and very slow. So slow in fact that the farmer is worried they might not get to market before it closes for the day. Anyway they come across an old man sitting by the side of the road. 'That cow looks like he's on his last legs' says the old man, and he hands the farmer two red pills. 'Now,' says the old man, 'If you stick one of these red pills up the cow's bottom he will be as right as rain.' Well the farmer sticks one of the red pills up the cow's bottom. The cow twitches three times and then he's off! He runs down the road towards the market as fast as a race horse. 'That's amazing!' says the farmer, 'Thanks a million for the pills. But what I don't understand is: why did you give me two pills?' 'Well,' says the old man, 'you want to catch him don't you?'

Professor Jape bursts into uncontrollable high pitched giggling and lots of the other children laugh too.

"Right children," says Jape. "That's all we've got time for in this lesson. I hope you had a good laugh, I know I did. See you next time."